“Babe, your dinner is ready” I said as I came to a hault at the bed. Gideon hates when one talks and moves, he said it’s disrespectful. He nods his head as he keeps on fiddling with his phone. I moved my tired body towards the make-up table wondering if this baby inside me will end my unhappiness. The happiness I casted away with my very own words, forgetting that the tongue is powerful.
“What’s for dinner” he said on his way out as he opens the bedroom door. I hate when he asks me what he already knows. Ohw, I know why he does that. An opportunity for him to hit me if I say what he doesn’t want to hear.
“Avocado toast. It’s in the microwave” I replied before sitting on the fancy stool that accompanied the make up table. I’m empty, I’ve been empty, and I might be empty for the rest of my life. I can’t believe I created this mess with my very own words.
Nancy told me I’ll regret this, yes she did but I cared less of her words. As for Joke, may her soul rest in perfect peace. As I try to wipe off the make-up that hides it all, a flashback of that very day, a decade ago flows without permission.
“It’s a lie! But you guys just met” Nancy said with disgust in her voice.
“And so? He wants to settle down. Not just with anyone, but with someone that’s classic, hot, and a complete full package” I said in an articulate manner. Not to brag, but I’m fluent in English.
“And you’re the hottie?” Nancy asked as she burst out laughing, a laugh so annoying I could hit her to death.
“Well, of course. I’m the full package in case you’ve forgotten. Babe, I’ve suffered so much in this my small life and I’m not going to suffer in marriage. Money speaks me and I speak money” I said turning to face Joke who’s said nothing since we arrived. “Joke? Are you okay?” I asked. It’s unlikely of her to be silent, she’s quite a hyper.
“Yeah, I’m good” she said plainly.
“Put mouth for my matter naah” I said, as I glanced at Nancy who in return gave me a shrug. Joke’s acting strange but our motto is being open and she knows that. But if she’s not ready to talk, who are we to force her.
“What about happiness? Don’t you want to be happy? Gift might not be rich but he’s the perfect guy for you, he’ll give you happiness” Joke said.
“She’s right” Nancy concluded.
“I don’t understand, how did Gift come into this conversation?” I said with annoyance. Gift is my boyfriend, I’m tired of his world, a world filled with hardship and suffering. He’s diligent but luck is not just on his side, or rather money is not on his side and might never be till in the next decade. “I’m going to end things with him today. After all, I’m now someone’s wife to be. I’ll soon be Mrs Gideon,” I said. “I’m glad I have no parents to control my life” I concluded as I rolled my eyes.
“We are talking about happiness here and not money Jayjay. You guys just met two weeks ago and all you could say to him was ‘yes you do’?” Nancy said with the same irritating disgust in her voice. My girls call me Jayjay, short for Janet.
“Who happiness epp? Happiness can’t give me money, but money can give me happiness” I said with a smile.
“Money can’t give you happiness Jayjay” Joke said. I’m shocked at her words. Her husband is stinky rich and she always brags about how good her married life is. She was the first to marry amongst us. Though I had a feeling she’s hiding a lot from us but I don’t really care.
“Well, then more money can. Com’on babes, one man’s kerosene lantern is another man’s rechargeable lamp. Your happiness is love and no cash and the rest of the other boring stuffs that follows which is obviously my sadness. My happiness is cash, more cash, excess cash. I don’t want happiness, your kind of happiness. I want my kind of happiness” I said picking up my glass of irish cream.
“Jayjay!? Jayjay!?” Gideon’s yell brought me back to reality as he barges into the room with the plate of avocado toast in his hand causing me to stand on my feet Immediately. “Did you put pepper in this?” He asked.
“No! You said this morning that you’ve been purging since last night. Putting pepper would only worsen your situ…” A slap landed on my face before I could finish speaking.
“Are you mad? Did I ask for your help? You idiot!” He said pasting the avocado toast on my face causing me to stagger. I quickly held onto him so as not to fall but he acted like I stepped on his balls because he was fusing with anger. “How dare you!” He said as he slapped my hands off him with so much force that I fell hitting myself so hard on the floor. The only thing I care for now is my seven months old unborn child as I felt my thighs go wet. Ohw no, I’m bleeding again. Not another death, how many more will I loss? Wasn’t five enough?
“Not the sixth one. Not the sixth one, not again” I said in tears as he fills my already bruised face and body with more bruises. As I lay on the floor helpless and used to the pain, I recall my own very words I brought to life a decade ago. ‘I don’t want happiness, your kinda happiness. I want my kind of happiness’. I came to understand and believe that one should be careful what one wishes for, one might just get it.
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